


i apologize for the cruel things that i did

by Brie (Kura)



Series: Let The World Know [10]
Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Battleground & Raw fallout, Gen, M/M, Some Cuddling, ambrolleigns friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-24
Updated: 2014-07-24
Packaged: 2018-02-10 06:01:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2013756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kura/pseuds/Brie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(<i>but i don't regret one single word i said</i>)</p><p>He picks up the call, casually saying, 'Yup?' Seth sounds slightly ticked off when he demands, 'Let me in.' <i>Oh God, please no, don't let that stupid kid be anywhere near our hotel room</i>, Roman thinks while walking to the door, gripping the handle tightly. He needs a moment to decide if it's wise to invite his brother in. </p><p>It's not, but honestly, what choice does he have?</p>
            </blockquote>





	i apologize for the cruel things that i did

**Author's Note:**

> I know. I know. I didn't finish the last part yet but I wasn't happy with Kane in the chapter, so now I need to rewrite it. Kane is my all time favourite wrestler and I want to do him justice. But seriously, Seth's missing part wasn't important for this one, since it only deals with Battleground and what happened on Raw the following night. So, enjoy some bonding time with The Shield =)

'You think we crossed a line tonight?' Dean asks and throws his bag in an empty corner of the room; and of course all of his stuff falls out of it, because he tends to forget to close the damn thing.

Roman follows the trail of dirty clothes drenched in day old sweat, leaning down to pick up each item with an internal sigh, and puts it all back in the duffel before he even considers about answering his friend's question. There's no doubt he's talking about taunting Seth with the briefcase after their dark match after Raw went off air, playing a little game of monkey in the middle with the kid.

'Maybe,' he murmurs, suddenly not so hyped because of their win over Seth and Kane anymore. It's unusual that Dean is the one showing concern for Seth's well-being, and not him. Unusual but not unheard of. Oh, the changes a simple epiphany can cause.

'He's already complained about us doing the fist thing once again tonight.' Well, maybe Seth shouldn't have turned his back on them, so he could still be doing it _with them_ instead of having to watch his family enjoying themselves without him.

Roman sighs, this time loudly, and sags down on the chair in the corner of the room. 'He talked to you?' Dean rubs over his injured shoulder, rolling it back and forth with a pained face, and grabs his phone to throw it at Roman. 'Talking might not be the right word, it’s so overrated anyway, which is why I haven’t written anything back, but yeah.'

He taps on the phone, searching for the latest messages. Compared to Roman, Dean doesn't mind his texts being read by his brother. Because he has nothing to hide, as he always says. Dean is unpretentious like that. Not that Roman has anything confidential on his phone, but he still likes to draw a line somewhere.

He spends over two hundred days on the road with Dean, they're always cooped up in the tiniest hotel rooms or cars. He shares everything with his family, so Roman has decided long ago that his privacy might be non-existent on most days, but that doesn't mean he can't have one.

Even Dean has learned that lesson after their little fallout, now asking politely every time if he can read what Seth has written. Because that's all he's interested in, all he wants to know. Dean doesn't care about his cousins telling him another joke or sending him funny pictures.

Even after seven weeks everything in Dean's head revolves solely around Seth, which is kind of cute, if he thinks about it. Seth is a very lucky man; yet the other doesn't even know. It's also ironic and Roman enjoys this more than he should.

Just like throwing the briefcase back and forth with Dean while Seth desperately tried to snatch it. It had been so familiar to all three of them, had reminded them of how perfect everything was just three months ago, when they could do this in their hotel rooms with Seth's clothes or his wallet all day long and in good fun.

_Really?_

_I mean, I love that The Shield is still standing tall and all that, even though you guys are not officially working together anymore, but do you constantly need to remind me what I can't have anymore?_

_That's not funny._

_Can't you just, I don't know, hug each other or do a happy dance or make out in front of everyone, so I can sit backstage and stab myself repeatedly because I already have understood perfectly what a gigantic idiot I am?_

_You guys are the bane of my existence._

_Answer me for fuck's sake!_

'How did he even notice that? I thought the cameras were off?' Roman says, setting the mobile phone aside again. Dean shrugs, wincing slightly when his shoulder stings because of it, and slips out of his shoes. 'How does Seth get wind of anything he knows? Like a true ninja, he has eyes and ears everywhere. Just accept it and don't ask any questions. Trust me, your life will be so much better.'

Roman smiles and rolls his eyes, taking off his vest when his own cell rings. Dean shoots him an amused look, nodding towards the chiming device before practically swaggering into the bathroom to claim once again the first shower with the only hot water. God damn, he's always losing that fight.

He picks up the call, casually saying, 'Yup?' Seth sounds slightly ticked off when he demands, 'Let me in.' _Oh God, please no, don't let that stupid kid be anywhere near our hotel room_ , Roman thinks while walking to the door, gripping the handle tightly. He needs a moment to decide if it's wise to invite his brother in.

It's not, but honestly, what choice does he have?

'Rome, I said let me in.' Fine, whatever. He pushes the door open just to be greeted by darkness. There is no one standing in front of him. Roman turns his gaze to the side and sees Seth standing in front of the completely wrong entrance, looking all kinds of lost and angry and even sad.

They have parked their car in front of room four, even though they ended up taking number seven; both of them too lazy to care about it. 'Over here,' he calls out, trying to hide his glee and failing miserably when Seth whips his head around, his face turning a shade whiter.

His little brother looks like he's seen a ghost. And as soon as Seth walks up to him, Roman recognizes the haunted look in the brown eyes that not even the thick-rimmed glasses can hide, as well as the slight sheen of sweat covering his forehead, and he steps aside immediately to let his friend in.

'How did you find us?' he wants to know, slowly closing the door after he made sure there is no one else out there to spy on them. Seems like this whole ordeal has made all three of them a tiny bit paranoid.

Seth waits a second, wide eyes searching the room for something he doesn't find, before he sighs tiredly and his whole body deflates so hard that he has to sit down. Wow, seems like he really is heartbroken over the whole _Dean and Roman are still best buddies while I have to play alone_ thing.

'Well, obviously I've read Dean's _Stalker 101_ very thoroughly, because I successfully managed to follow The Shield without them noticing.' Seth sounds not half as confident and sarcastic as he wants to; the insecurity making Roman frown and sit down next to him on the sofa.

'Hey, easy there. What's wrong?' he tries to soothe his brother and hugs him close before he can change his mind in the last second again. Roman can practically feel Seth going limp in his arms, finally able to let go of whatever is haunting him.

Seth buries his face in Roman's neck with such ferocity that he fears his brother wants to hide his head inside of his chest; just to escape reality for a while. But sadly, it's not that easy. Seth can't take cover behind Roman's back anymore. Neither can Roman shield his baby brother from any harm. It's a loss for everyone involved.

'Everything is spinning out of control since Sunday and tonight didn't make it any better,' Seth whispers – hot breath ghosting over his bare chest –, desperately hanging on to his brother's frame while in the bathroom Dean is taking a shower, not knowing about any of this.

Roman wonders if he should try to get rid of Seth before Dean is done or if he should watch the story unfold as soon as they clash.

But since Seth came here to find shelter and he really doesn't want to send his brother out into the dark night all alone and broken, Roman ditches option two to pat his friend on the head, playing with the blond patch as long as it's still there.

(Roman really hopes that the hair curse will pass him by unnoticed. He's investing a lot of work to maintain that long, well-bred mane and he doesn't want to lose it like his brothers.)

But just because he's decided to let Seth cuddle with him, it doesn't mean that he'll go easy on the kid. Because Seth still can't keep his face in check, even after seven weeks, and that's not only dumb but also very risky.

'Yeah, I know,' he starts, resting his cheek on Seth's hair. 'You once again couldn't control your emotions. And that in front of Triple H and Randy. No, Seth, don't give me that look,' he adds, letting go of his friend as soon as he catches the sulking expression in the mirror of the cupboard.

'I– but he– I mean, Cesaro,' Seth stammers incoherently and so utterly helpless that Roman can't suppress a forgiving grin. 'It's okay. I fear no matter how many times I warn you, you'll still never learn.'

Seth mutters something along the lines of _but I did better the second time the camera caught me_ , before he slings his arms around Roman once more to whisper in his ear, 'Is he taking a shower?'

No, Roman is just letting all the hot water run because he prefers the bathroom at a warm temperature and it's so much fun to listen to the sound of the shower; kind of like a chilling during a rainstorm. And besides, who doesn't enjoy freezing to death in a shower in freaking Florida?

He has just opened his mouth, only able to squeeze out the words _don't go_ when Seth determinedly jumps up and barges into the adjacent room like Dean usually enters every scene. '– in there,' Roman finishes his sentence, waiting for the inevitable insult as soon as Seth makes his presence felt.

It never comes.

Instead, Roman hears Dean laugh lightly, snickering, 'Hey there, handsome. You mind closing the curtain again? That is, unless you don't intend to hop in.' He's ready to leave those two lovestruck idiots alone when Seth just hisses, 'Get your ass outta there.'

Now that was unexpected.

Seth storms out of the bathroom again, not meeting his quizzical stare. 'Okay, what's gotten into you?' 'What– you wanna know _what_?' his brother spits out, reminding Roman way too much of Dean. Seth isn't one to explode and lash out at anyone in sight.

But then again, Dean isn't known for staying calm when someone interrupts his shower. Did he miss the memo that it's Opposite Day?

'You really need to ask that?' Seth seethes, pacing the room to get rid of the uneasiness slowing down his body and mind. It takes a while but ultimately, his friend calms down enough to sit back down next to him, finally able to look Roman in the eyes again. 'I mean, first of all, I'm sorry.'

Now that Seth has started to apologize for all the things he's done to Roman and Dean, he just won't stop. He seems to think that _everything_ is his fault, because as a part of the Authority he should be able to control every damn thing that happens in his family's life. But that's just an illusion.

Seth might be pulling the strings, but he can't predict all the little details. Like Stephanie being against working with Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar but Hunter convincing her of the collaboration. Or Dean attacking him backstage at the Pay-per-view, causing Daddy Big Nose to ban him from the arena, robbing everyone in the building of the match of the century.

'Hey, it wasn't supposed to be,' Roman winks at him, finally stepping out of his ring pants to put on some sweats and a tank top. 'You warned me that Brock would come back today.' And the moment he heard that from Seth, he knew he only had one chance to grab that title. And he wasn't able to seize that opportunity on the weekend.

Now he's back where he began, at the bottom of the totem pole. But he'll be damned if he won't work his way up to another title match; only to end it with a win of his own. He won't fail another time.

'No,' Seth shakes his head multiple times, stepping closer to lay his hands on Roman's chest. 'I'm sorry you lost at Battleground.' He can see it in Seth's eyes. The guilt, the pain, the _I should have done something_ , _I could have done more_.

But Seth is already giving all he can. He needs to learn that he can trust his brothers to go the rest of the path on their own. 'New day, new game plan.' Roman might be out of the championship picture for now, but the Authority hasn't seen the last of him.

He won't stop fighting every day of his life to get what he wants.

'So, dear brother of mine, you wanna tell me why you're white as a sheet?' Seth lifts his head and stares into the mirror, only now realizing how awful he looks. His fingers shake a bit when they brush over his skin, eyes going slightly hollow. Maybe Dean isn't the only member of his family Roman should be concerned about.

Seth sighs dramatically and slumps back, wishing the couch would swallow him whole. 'I haven't slept since Saturday,' he finally explains, only barely able to stifle a yawn. Since the day before yesterday? Their baby brother is on his feet for almost sixty hours now? Probably even more; depending on when he woke up on the weekend.

Roman cups his hands around Seth's jaw and examines the dark circles under the brown, almost lifeless, bloodshot eyes. He can't believe how he could miss that earlier on Raw and as soon as Seth walked into the room. 'I wore make-up,' Seth throws light upon that tiny mystery, leaving Roman to ponder over the question if he should make fun of Seth for that or just move on with the conversation.

Being the big brother that does like to joke around but loves it even more to protect and scold, he settles for the latter, asking a bit incredulously, 'You mean, you didn't nod off at all? Not even once?' Like taking a nap in between, so he wouldn't crash a car in the middle of buttfuck nowhere, for example.

Just thinking about the risk Seth took by driving here makes him shudder. 'No,' Seth whispers and Roman allows his brother to rest his weary head on his chest again.

'There was just so much I had to do on the weekend to prepare for Battleground. All the talking with Kane and pulling wires with Triple H. And then there was the actual Pay-per-view, where Dean just fucked up _all_ of my plans, so I had to ditch them and do everything on the fly. Which is so hard; you have no idea.'

Actually, he does know a thing or two about improvising whenever Dean is involved but he chooses to remain silent; giving Seth the much needed affirmation that he's the most important thing right now and that every word he says is a hundred percent true.

Arms sneak their way around his waist, silently begging for another hug that will make all of his friend's worries go away. Possible hard feelings or not, Roman can't say no to that. He is, first and foremost, Seth's big brother and hell will freeze over before he'll deny such simple wishes.

'And after yesterday I was just so... Because of Dean hiding in my trunk, I couldn't stop looking behind me. I never thought he'd get into my car.'

Roman chuckles, distantly realizing that the water of the shower got turned off some time ago. Dean in the trunk was something new and unexpected, but then again it really wasn't. Their friend definitely has some criminal energy in him; breaking into cars is probably child's play for him. 'You're afraid of your own brother?'

Seth scoffs indignantly, sitting up straight again to show his defiance. What a cute little boy he is. 'What? _No_. Though it does freak me out a bit that he's always able to find me.' Roman would like to say that, in terms of creepiness and perseverance, Seth is in no way inferior to Dean, but his friend is already talking again animatedly.

'I keep looking over my shoulder because I expect the Authority to be able to keep tabs on me without me noticing either. It's messing with my head really badly.'

Great. If this goes on for, say, another two months, they'll all be hysterical messes, unable to trust even themselves. They should start to relax a bit more. Dean and Seth should also stop meeting in the middle of the night, endangering Seth's cover.

He'll probably get beheaded if he ever dares to propose that though. No matter how reasonable it would be.

So Roman just accepts his new life of madness and being constantly on edge as soon as they leave a hotel or the arena. He'll just have to work twice as hard to keep his family safe and chase after his dreams. Easy as pie, right?

'Yet you're here. Not because you wanted to give Dean a piece of your mind but because you're lonelier than ever and you want your brothers back. Even if it's just for one night.'

Seth opens his mouth to talk back at him, but stops himself before a word can slip out. They both know Roman is right and there is no use denying it. He could have said that a bit more gentle, but all three of them need the simple, sometimes cruel truth at the moment. No more lying and pampering.

'Seven weeks are a long time to spend alone,' his brother finally says, tone impossibly sad and begging at the same time. Like he wants to ask Roman to take him back tonight, tomorrow and for the rest of their lives, even though Seth knows very well that he can't make that decision alone and that Seth needs to play his part as turncoat until the end.

There is no going back anymore. They're already in too deep for that.

He can't take the weight off of Seth's shoulders, but he can try to ease it, can help his brother carry it. It's in that moment that Roman decides to not let his friend go back to his own hotel tonight. He'll allow him just this once to stay, _if_ Dean is not against it.

The bathroom door opens and they both look at Dean, who walks in with a towel around his neck, wearing nothing but pajama bottoms. 'Alright, ladies, what's going on here?' he asks, rubbing over his hair while squeezing himself between Seth and Roman on the couch.

Roman just wants to make himself a bit more comfortable when Seth jumps up and points an accusing finger right at Dean's chest. He actually jabs at it, just for good measure. 'What in God's name were you thinking last night? Attacking me over and over; getting _thrown out_ of the arena?'

Okay, so they're still going to do that. He's perfectly fine with it though. Mostly because he too wonders why Dean flipped his shit so much in front of the camera, but had laughed and grinned like an idiot in the car and their motel. No matter how much he'd grilled Dean, his best friend wouldn't share anything with him.

Seth had texted him a lot after Battleground, asking if he could get his stuff that he forgot in the parking lot, as well as his golden briefcase and what he had done to deserve Dean being such a jerk yet again.

Roman had answered that Dean got his stuff – taking back some shirts that are rightfully his own, while leaving new ones in Seth's suitcase to make up for it – and that everything was perfectly fine with their brother. Whatever plan they had come up with, it had been a stupid one and Roman would like to slap them both for doing this to all the fans that actually paid to see their match.

When Seth had answered that none of that had been part of his strategy, Roman once again tried to talk with Dean about it; still to no avail.

So this right now intrigues him too, has him almost on the edge of his seat. He's always loved to watch Seth and Dean go at it, because they remind him of two newborn puppies, stubbornly trying to butt heads to fight over who is the strongest but being horribly blind and disoriented at the same time.

It's a lot of fun, as long as no one starts to throw punches or gets unnecessarily offending – which is generally the point Roman chooses to end things.

Dean throws his hands up in defeat, swatting Seth's finger away in the same motion. 'In my defense, I never thought Hunter would ban me from the arena.'

Dean grabs Seth by the wrist and tugs at his arm, so he'll sit down again. Roman watches mesmerized while scooting away to give his baby brother a bit more space to breathe, muttering without really realizing, 'Not that _that_ stopped you from coming back time and time again.'

Sometimes, Dean really is like a cockroach. Indestructible, annoying and creepy, but also resilient and smart. A true survivor.

Seth pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing loudly, yanking his hand free again. 'Why?' he just breathes, shooting Roman a helpless glance, as if he could give him all the answers. He pats Seth tenderly on the head and repeats the question when Dean refuses to answer right away.

'You said you were afraid of Battleground being our last match. So I ensured it wouldn't be.' Seth stands up again and flails his arms for a moment, before he accuses Dean once more, not yet getting the hidden meaning of Dean's words. This is so much better than Roman had expected.

'We didn't even _have_ a match,' Seth yells frustrated now, sinking down on the table in front of the sofa to glare daggers at Dean as if that could somehow help him make a point. Dean just stares back, eyebrows slowly moving upwards, a smirk dancing over his face. 'And yet you let yourself be declared the winner. By forfeit.'

Seth kicks Dean lightly against the shin, wincing when his bad knee flares up in pain and kicks his brother a second time with his other leg. 'I had to do something,' he defends himself sternly. 'Why didn't you tell me what you were going to do?'

So Seth still hasn't figured it out yet. Dean doing their friend this favor should tell Seth everything he needs to know about the feelings he has for him; in case there still are any doubts even after Roman already told him of their true nature.

Dean shrugs casually, getting up to throw the towel through the open bathroom door – Roman wants to scoff at him that he really has to stop being so messy – and slips into a white wife-beater. His best friend doesn't see the relieved expression flickering over Seth's face at that, but Roman does.

It's apparently pretty hard for his baby brother to concentrate when Dean is walking around almost naked. Really, his brothers are teasing, adorable twerps that should probably just fuck it out.

'Wouldn't have been a surprise then, would it?' Dean helps Seth along, giving the final hint their brother needs to fully comprehend what Dean really did at Battleground. Roman hadn't known that Seth had been afraid of losing Dean all over again as soon as their feud would be over, but now that he does, he too can fully appreciate his best friend's actions from last night.

And people say Dean is the uncaring, selfless, lunatic one when in reality he's the sweetest, most protective person Roman knows; always trying to please the ones he loves. Sometimes he can't help but think that it's as if Dean is way better at doing this job than Roman.

'Wait,' Seth frowns, his whole mind coming to an abrupt halt. 'You did this for _me_?' It's hilarious how stunned their little brother sounds, how quickly he blinks as if he's expecting the whole world to disappear right in front of his eyes. 'So we can prolong... all of this?'

There's awe and gratitude swinging in Seth's croaky voice, the haunted look finally vanishing out of the now sparkling brown eyes. He didn't want to get in the middle of this, but Dean looks so content with himself and Seth is one second away from flinging his arms around Dean's neck, crying happily that Roman just can't contain himself anymore.

'Quite romantic, isn't it? In a very unique Dean Ambrose way, but still. Lucky you.' Seth's gaze meets Roman’s, his whole face lighting up – which makes him thankfully look normal again – before he just crashes forward and really does fall around Dean's neck. Minus the tears though. Instead there's a roaring laughter echoing in the room, infecting Roman in no time.

'Shut up,' Dean answers, cheeks blushing, eyes searching Roman's to silently plead for some help. God, it's like the two of them have never been in such a situation. Well, in Dean's case that might even be true. 'It's no big deal,' he adds flustered, frantically trying to play the issue down.

'No big deal. Rome, did you hear that?' Seth turns his head around, a huge smile splitting his face in half, as he still holds on to Dean with all his strength. 'Yep,' Roman replies good-heartedly. 'He said no big deal.'

They both know it's a fucking huge deal. Roman is even sure that Dean is aware of that too. Which makes his best friend's reddened and slightly scared face so much more funnier. 'What?' his brother grits out grumpily, finally able to hug Seth close to his chest too.

'Nothing,' Seth pipes up happily, beaming at Roman once more before he places his nose in the crook of Dean's neck, climbing into the other's lap to get more comfortable. This should be his cue to leave the two of them alone, if he wouldn't know for certain that Dean doesn't want that. Not if he can't make the rules for their encounters.

Which is why he offers Seth exactly what he came here for, while giving Dean time to think about it and approve of his decision. 'So, what do you say, Romeo? Should we let Prince Charming sleep here tonight?' Seth whips his head around at the speed of light, wide dark eyes staring into his with disbelief and eternal gratitude.

'Seriously?' he whispers so low that Roman's heart clenches for a second. This isn't how his family used to be. It's nice to see Seth be all chipper and excited about getting to spend the night with them like in old times, but it's still wrong. Seth should be with them all day long.

Dean rubs over their brother's back twice before he accepts Roman's invitation. 'I guess, for old time's sake, why not?' Seth lets go of Dean to hug Roman instead, babbling something about forgiveness and making it up to them. Roman doesn't understand half of it because Seth's mouth is pressed against his collarbone, but he doesn't need to.

Seth doesn't owe them anything for this. It's just another bonding session, right? They're only making some more progress to get their family, their old unity back.

Dean uses that moment to get up and watch the two of them from above, gracing them with one of his rare but breathtaking, _honest_ smiles, before he walks to his suitcase to pull out some clothes for Seth. Roman is relieved to see the kid is getting some of the freshly washed stuff.

He holds the shorts and black tank out for Seth to grab it and Roman pushes his friend gently off of him, so he can go to the bathroom and get changed. As soon as their brother has closed the door behind him, Roman walks up to Dean to give him a one-armed, tight embrace, all the while whispering, 'I'm proud of you.'

Dean just lowers his head and crawls into the bed, but Roman knows he's in fact on cloud nine right now. 'You wanna be in the middle?' Roman offers in a hushed tone, so Seth won't hear. Dean lying down on the left side of the bed should be answer enough but he still gets a delighted, 'Nope. This is a family night, not something about him and me.'

'As you wish,' he remarks, following Dean into the king-sized bed and taking his rightful place in the center. Seth doesn't even hesitate a second when he comes out of the bathroom – Dean's clothes hanging loosely down his smaller frame –, doesn't complain or give them a dirty look.

He just jumps under the covers and snuggles close to Roman's other side, sighing mirthfully.

'I missed you,' is the last thing Roman hears before he drifts off into sleep and even in his dream he can't help but wonder which one of them had whispered that truth into the dark.

**Author's Note:**

> And before I forget it again, [LeahMarie624](http://leahmarie624.tumblr.com/post/91644786690/dean-seth-broken-so-this-vid-is-a-result-of-me) made this video for my series and I can't thank her enough for it! <333


End file.
